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04/12/2005 Entry: "Theonion's yesterday's tomorrows"

It was once said in the time of homesteaders and sharecroppers that in the hardest of times musicians did the best. Now, I'm no Leadbelly, but I've actually tried to support myself solely by music in the past--both times when Europe was dipping into recession. All I can say from the experience is that we all go down together--to paraphrase Billy Joel and also an 80's Paul Mcartney song with animated frogs as well.

But when prominent musicians go down, critics sharpen up their fickle fangs and thin the herd with ravenous succinctness.

However, when a carnivour or scavenger devours it's prey, it's gone, baby. In the newer school of journalism, the fang-ed ones have also learned to chew the cud.
That would be what I refer to as "list journalism", a phenomenon that always was there yet has come most presently into the public eye front-and-center in the last two or three years. The ten greatest books ever ever. The fifty greatest recorded drumsolos. The thousand coolest things a singer said during a guitar solo. The 12 sexiest holy relics.

That brings me to my point: even my favorite film and music critics, the lads and lasses at the Onion AV Club have fallen yet again prey to this wanker trend. Exibit G: a list of yesterday's tomorrows--a short list of promising and paradigm-shifting music acts who didn't shift any paradigm to speak of. Additional cynical information on how the survivors try to regroup and cash in on their long faded fame also available. That last bit is was sours the compassionate into crassness and really pisses me off.

Anyhoo, for any of my students who try to sludge through those critiques yet find them impassible, be consoled. I have one hell of a time making heads or tails through most of the stuff written in the Sax.